"Life in the Snow Globe"

So here we are with cold weather bearing down on us. "Well hello there, Jack Frost. Go away now please." Snow is starting to fall and I'll be honest, I just don't like it. 

Unfortunately, it's something that happens every year. The temperatures plummet, blizzards dropping more powder than Charlie Sheen at a bachelor party, and I've gotta start buying Christmas gifts.  Not that I mind buying Christmas gifts but I'd be fine with handing those out in tank tops instead. 

So here I am revisiting an old topic. Global warming. Tell me, do you feel exceptionally warm right now in the Northern Hemisphere? I think probably not. The only thing colder is my friend, Jeri's house. That place? Pfft. Elsa would need a parka. I'm not kidding. Last time I was there there was a polar bear standing around a burning barrel like one of those homeless guys on tv shows. I had to fetch a thermal blanket for a penguin suffering from frostbite. And that was a summer visit. 

I digress. We were discussing global warming. "Climate change", as they call it now. That's the reason I'm given for why so many steel mills and coal yards are closing down. Interesting theory. Except...

Why are we getting so much steel from China now? Or shipping them so much coal to use in steel mills? Don't they share the same planet as us? One would think that "climate change" would affect them too. 

Yet, somehow, it's only something we worry about here in the States. We've got the EPA all over us in the trucking industry. Many states have laws stating "no idling of vehicles over 5 tons longer than 5 minutes." Apparently it's perfectly ok in smaller vehicles. 

In fact, I was out in California a few years ago and there were 3 EPA trucks there for 9 hours writing tickets for idling trucks. The whole time those EPA trucks were idling in the parking lot looking for violators. 

Ever been to California? Their public buses and school buses smoke like steam engines from the 1800's. They get a pass though because they're state run. Sure, that seems to make sense. Only ticket the people who need their trucks to run so they can sleep comfortably. 

I even asked one of the EPA guys "what if you've got pets with you? It's 105 degrees outside and even hotter in these big metal trucks." He responded that that is no excuse for idling. However, if you have a pet in that kind of heat then that's animal cruelty and they'll call the sheriff out to fine you for it. Am I the only one that finds this whole situation absurd? 

I asked "well what about you guys sitting here idling your trucks for hours while you look for people to ticket?" That's the point at which he finally asked me which truck was mine. "The one of there that doesn't have ac so it's pointless to idle. Why, you wanna spend the next few hours sitting in IT while you ticket people for being comfortable?" Turns out he didn't find that option attractive. Like I'm gonna be dumb enough to have my truck running while I point out the hypocrisy of their mission? 

Can't run your truck for ac or for heat. Welcome to truck driving. Trust me, it's not for everyone. One would think that we folks driving 80,000 pound+ vehicles would be among these the government wants sleeping well. 

Now that the roads are gonna get icy and people in cars are gonna try figure skating on the highways I'm even less thrilled. I don't even put ice in my drinks, what makes nature think I want it on my roads? 

"Dino Stee of Change"

I notice they've changed their stance from "global warming" to "climate change". Why's that you wonder? Well, I'm thinking the fact it's July and I'm running around in 60 degree weather might be part of the reason. I mean, seriously, it's certainly not warming up much lately. Not that I'm complaining. 

So it's spring time weather in the middle of summer yet polar ice caps are melting. How ever do we explain this?  We call it climate change. And claim that that climate change is brought on by mankind. Well that seems like a sound theory. But I've got a couple questions about that theory. 

Not to discount man's impact on the planet because we do definitely leave an ecological footprint. I'd be a fool to deny that. However, I'm a bit curious, didn't this planet undergo an ice age or 5 before mankind even existed? I believe that, technically, what we are in now is considered an interglacial period. 

So, if I understand this correctly, this planet has undergone many "climate changes" without our help. That's odd, I thought this was all Man's fault. Carbon footprints, greenhouses gases, etc. can't be denied. But I'm also pretty sure that the continued evolution of this planet can't be denied. 

So if greenhouses gases and fossil fuels are the culprits I'm wondering what factories the dinosaurs ran. You figure T Rex was like a supervisor? He might be hard pressed to fill out paperwork with those nubby little arms of his but operating heavy machinery definitely had to be out of the question. In a managerial capacity he had to be nearly useless other than motivation. Maybe the factory owner was a Stegosaurus named Frank. 

Frank: "Hey T, I'm noticing the Anatosauruses are slacking on production. Handle it."

Next day T meets with Frank. "Hey Frankie (he calls him Frankie because, contrary to popular belief, they were close friends) I had a talk with the AU (that's short for Anatosaurus Union) and I ate two members. Their Union Rep, Vinny says he got the point and he'll make sure they step it up. Production is back on schedule." To which Frank would reply, "well done but don't eat too many. It takes those slackers 6 years to reach legal working age. I don't need any flack from the Pteranodons. (They're like the OSHA of the Triassic and Jurassic eras)" 

So they had big Stone Works Factories popping up all over the world creating "climate change", right? But then there was that whole "extinction level event". I wonder what caused that. Things were running so smoothly. 

Maybe it was like this....

T. rex: "hey Frank, we've been experimenting with hydrogen like you wanted so we can increase output. The problem is, we're dinosaurs and don't understand physics or science. You know they don't invent that stuff for another 65 billion years, right?"

Frank: "I don't care. We need to figure it out as we go then. Between the velociraptors trying to start a hostile takeover and these darn climate changes we've started we've gotta do something to up production! And don't trifle me with details!"

T. rex: "yous the boss. I'll get after it. Maybe we can figure out a way to split hydrogen atoms and quadruple production. I'll get the brontosaurus team on it."(With their long necks they were the closest they had to physicists or scientists)

A week or so goes by, (who knows, it could've been a decade; they didn't have calendars back then) and things go all wonky. BAM! Explosions everywhere. So Frank freaks out as he's packing. "What the hell is going on T?!" 

"Well, Frankie, I told you we didn't know what we're doing. Now we've accidentally caused everything on the planet to blow up. We're all gonna DIE!!" 

Oh? That's not how it happened you say? Well then, maybe there's a chance the planet is just doing the same thing it's been doing for billions of years. Little growth spurts then some cooler weather. Are we affecting this any? Maybe. But I don't think it'd change much if we weren't here to kill each other off either. Animals evolve (you know they've found a snake whose tail looks like a spider now? That's some scary shit), plants evolve, isn't it possible that our planet is basically a giant organism that's evolving too? 

How arrogant of us, thinking we are significant enough to make a huge impact on a planet that was here billions of years before us and will be here billions of years after we are gone. It's like fleas fighting over who owns the dog they're on. 

Let's look at it this way, a eukaryotic cell, tiny as it is, has a nucleus. Like the Earth's core. Cell walls like the mantle of the earth and groups with billions of other cells. Like galaxies. 

Our universe extends further than our imagination can reach. So what if we are all basically equivalent to subatomic particles on the tiniest of cells? 

Wanna take that a hair farther? Why not consider the Sun the nucleus of a mere atom with the planets circling it like protons and neutrons? That'd kinda make our entire universe one amazing organism. Large beyond our ability to conceptualize. That idea would make a supreme being like God not only possible but real.